Perspective

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I think it’s safe to say that I’m officially obsessed with being pregnant. I absolutely love every single thing about it. The good, the bad, the gross, the scary, the magical. It’s honestly all so amazing to me. I love knowing that my body is creating a little human being, our own human to love and to care for and to teach and to watch grow. It’s truly like nothing I can or will ever be able to explain and because of that it is so easy to feel truly grateful every single second of every day. 

Now to be fair let’s be honest, before actually getting pregnant I was also obsessed with “trying to get pregnant.” If you didn’t read my first pregnancy post about our 13 months of trying (you can read it here, just like that) and even though in the thick of it the only thing that I thought I wanted was to get pregnant I was also fearful.

I love our life, Colt & I’s. I love our marriage. I love our friendship. I love our love for adventure and our equal love of lazy days. I love that we do whatever we want, whenever we want at the drop of a dime. I just love us, I really do. I love who we are together and how we make each other better. 

With all that being said it’s really no big surprise that when we first started talking about having kids although it fascinated me it also equally scared me to death. I didn’t want all the above things to change. I didn’t know if I (or we) were ready to change in so many drastic ways. 

After 5 years together and 2 years married I still wasn’t sold that we were ready for that next chapter, until we started “trying” and it didn’t happen. Let’s face it nothing makes you want something more than not being able to have it. So insert my obsession and what seemed like forever but looking back now I know it’s exactly how it was meant to be. 

Not getting pregnant right away was an unknown very hard to deal with blessing in disguise. It gave us the time we needed to really get ready and really decide whole heartily that this is what we truly wanted. It helped us to get use to the idea of becoming parents long before we would actually ever be parents. It gave us time to be there for each other in a way we never had to be before. It made us better and stronger and some days bitter and weak. It also made us appreciate when the test finally said “yes” that much more. It made this journey our own and for that I am grateful. 

Now that our first “trying to get pregnant journey” is behind us, my actual pregnancy has also made us happy in ways we never knew were possible. It’s made us think of things we’ve never thought about before. It’s allowed us to grow as individuals and together day by day and week by week. It’s allowed us to regain so much hope and faith. It’s allowed us to trust in something so much greater than ourselves and our own understanding. It’s allowed us to relinquish control of the uncontrollable.

In just 18 short weeks it’s already challenged and changed us in so many different ways and I am eager and excited to see what these next 22 weeks hold. 

I am honored to be your mother. I am honored to be your Daddy’s wife. And we are now forever honored to be your parents! We love you baby boy. 

18 weeks and 4 days 

  
    

17 weeks 



    
    

Love letters to our baby boy from Daddy  
  

Before I go I wanted to take a second to send out an extra special thank you to my best friend Anu. Her involvement, enthusiasm and love since day one to capture every moment of this journey has been the biggest blessing. Thank you for all your hard work and for the passion that you put into your photography! You have truly giving us irreplaceable memories for so many years to come. I love you boo! 

Until next time… 

It’s a…

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On Tuesday July 14th we met with the specialist from Oahu. He comes over to the Maui office once a month so I was grateful to be able to get an appointment here rather than having to fly over there. I woke up excited but anxious. I was really excited to see Baby Stew as well as get some actual answers on the condition of my septum but having answers also meant possible bad news so I was trying to keep an open but positive mind set. 

My appointment was at 1:15 and it seemed like the morning took forever to come and go. I was so happy when my last class finally ended at 12:00 and I was on my way (or so I thought). As I left class to go load up my van I noticed the back door wouldn’t open. Originally I thought that maybe it had locked from the inside which has happened before so I climbed around to take a look. Once I got inside I quickly realized the whole inside handle had somehow fallen off and the door was completely jammed, no no no no not today! 

I immediately tried calling Colt hoping he was still somewhere in Kihei and could come help me but his phone kept going right to voicemail so I tried a million different things until the panic finally started setting in. The clock was ticking and I was stuck I needed help and fast. I ran back into my class and asked if the teachers dad who was home could possibly come and help me. Poor guy had just come home from a root cannel but he was sweet enough to come take a look. He agreed that the door was jammed, the handle was unfixable without additional parts but he was able to get it open! I was so happy and grateful to be back on my way! 

When I arrived to the doctors office Colt was already there waiting and ready to look at the door. I had called him flipping out on my way to the doctors and he was well aware of the situation. In true Colt form he was calm and reassuring and was able to fix the door in less then 5 minutes, I was so grateful (my hero). I took a deep breath, let go of the day and we walked into the doctors office ready for anything!

After waiting for about 45 minutes they finally called our name. My stomach dropped as I thought here goes nothing! We walked into the room and we were greeted warmly by Dr. Hirata. I instantly knew I was going to like him and I could feel my whole body relax. I sat down in the chair and we went over all the routine questions and answers, minus when he asked if I had two uterus (umm, I freaking hope not) he then handed me a pair of 3D glasses to watch the ultra sound, lubed up my belly and got started. 

All I kept thinking was please, please don’t let me have two uterus. I didn’t, whew — but I did indeed have an arcuate uterus which in English basically means that although my uterus looks more normal than some other cases it actually has a dip, or slight indentation at the top. It is a more common abnormality, affecting about a quarter of women and depending on how far down the dip goes it can or can not cause different issues during pregnancy. In my case he said it was nothing to get overly worried or excited about. Colt immediately stopped him and said “can you please repeat that for her” he did — it was nothing to get overly worried or excited about. We all laughed and I once again started to feel really excited and relieved.

Once he was finished measuring and taking pictures of the septum he quickly moved on to baby Stew! It was so mind blowing getting to watch everything on those 3D glasses, it truly made me feel like I was inside my own uterus. Within seconds Baby Stew appeared on the screen and was looking cuter and bigger than ever! I squeezed Colts hand as this was the first time he was seeing the baby since our 8 week ultra sound! It was so awesome getting to see Baby Stew together. 

Dr. Hirata was measuring and talking to the nurse as we just sat there in complete awe watching Baby move around like crazy. You could now see so much of the development taking place, arms, legs, fingers, spine, eye sockets, ears and then just like that a SMILE. We froze as I loudly & overly excited asked was that just a smile?!? Indeed it had been, we got to see Baby Stew smile for the very first time. I melted into a thousand pieces and as I lay there thinking it really doesn’t get any better than this — it did, we were about to find out the sex. He asked us if we wanted to know! He had seen it on the screen and he was ready to confirm!  

Baby Stew’s Smile at 16 weeks 4 days

We very excitingly told him that yes we wanted to know and he told us that Baby Stew was a baby BOY! It was the Best.News.Ever! He then showed us to confirm and it was unmistakable our baby was a in fact a boy! Cloud 9, here we come!  

Baby Stew is a Baby BOY!

As he continued on with the ultra sound he confirmed that baby boy Stew’s heart, organs, and growth were all healthy and normal and exactly where they needed to be for 16 weeks and 4 days. He said as of now the septum is not having any adverse effects on the pregnancy or the baby and that things are good. I do however have to continue to see him throughout my pregnancy so that he can continue to keep a close eye on things. I see him again in six weeks to confirm that baby boy is still on track.

The main thing he will be keeping a close eye on is that baby continues to have enough room to grow. Other risk factors at this point are still premature labor, premature birth as well as the baby being breech and me having to deliver via c-section. Or I could carry full term and deliver naturally, we just won’t know until we know and for now that’s ok. 

  

Baby Stew is perfect and I’ve never been better. So today I’m whole heartily enjoying every second of right now and we couldn’t be anymore happy and or blessed! Thank you, thank you for all your love and prayers, we appreciate them more than you will ever know. 

We are having a boy!!  

   
    
   

Until next time….

We survived our first (and hopefully our only) visit to the ER! 

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We had our first official Baby scare last Sunday July 5th.

I woke up and like every other morning lately my allergies were already flaring out of control. I rolled over and sneezed and as I did the muscles in my stomach got really tight and painful. I laid there in pain for a few minutes and then the pain gradually lessened. I got up and went to the bathroom, I could still feel the pain but I figured I must have just pulled a muscle.

We had breakfast plans at Anu & Joe’s so I took a shower and got ready to go. We got to breakfast around 8 and Anu had a wonderful spread of strawberry and banana crepes. They were delicious and even though I was still in some pain and having discomfort I was able to eat. I was hoping eating would help but unfortunately it seemed to make it worse. I started thinking maybe I just had some really bad indigestion and that going to the bathroom would help — it didn’t!

We got home around 10 and I figured a nap might just do the trick! So I went and got all cozy in my pillow and passed out. I woke up around noon and the pain was gone. I was so happy and relieved until I got up to go pee. 

As soon as I went to the bathroom a huge amount of pain and pressure instantly washed over me but this time it was much stronger then before. I called for Colt who told me to call the doctors office.

Of course it being a Sunday my primary doctors office was closed but luckily I was able to get in touch with the on call nurse. I explained my situation from what had happened in the morning until now and she pretty much immediately suggested that I go to the ER and get checked. Her main points were one being the obvious that I was 15 weeks pregnant but also that since it was pain on my right side it could be anything from my appendix to gallstones to kidney stones. I hung up terrified and told Colt to get ready that we were going in.

The ride to the ER was the absolute worst not only because I was in a great deal of pain but also because at that point I was scared out of my mind. It was probably the most scared and out of control I’ve ever felt in my life. I just sat there crying and breathing and praying that the baby was going to be ok. 

We got to the hospital and of course it was packed. Not only was it the day after the 4th of July (I swear there was at least 5 people waiting with broken arms) but it was also a Sunday. I took a deep breath and prepared for the wait, I knew it was going to be a long one. As we waited to be called the pain was pretty constant between about a 4 to an 8 with the worst of it coming every time I would pee. 

After what seemed like forever (2+ hours) they finally called my name. We got in the room and went over everything with the nurse. She took my vitals and said the doctor would be in. At this point my pain had lessened and for that I was grateful. The doctor came in and ordered blood work, an IV hook up (just in case) and an ultra sound. 

They took me to the ultra sound area and wheeled me in. Unfortunately they wouldn’t allow Colt to come in the room with me. I was so anxious and panicked and just wanted to hear that the baby was ok. Whatever else it was with me could wait. 

The tech was an older lady. She was nice enough but still rough around the edges. She didn’t say much besides the usual small talk, “how many weeks was I,” “where was the pain,” “when did it start,” “any history of stones or appendicitis” I lay there still as she started and waited for her to confirm something, anything…what did she see. 

After looking for at least 15 minutes and not saying a word I was in a full blown panic attack so I finally asked if my baby was ok, she replied “she hadn’t even gotten there yet” she was making sure my appendix wasn’t going to burst. I took a deep breath as the tears started to flow pretty uncontrollably and my anxiety hit an all time high — I just kept thinking please, please dear God please tell me that my baby is ok, please!!! My baby HAS to be ok. Nothing

As I lay there waiting I hit my point where I knew I just couldn’t take even one more half a second without knowing, I was losing my mind and I knew I was about to pull a Vovo Manny (my very Portuguese grandfather) on this lady when suddenly there it was the most magical sound in the whole entire world, our babies heart beat — everything else fades away

She continued on for awhile without saying much. The whole ultra sound took over an hour. An hour doesn’t seem very long until your in pain and having extreme anxiety in which case it feels like 10 years. She eventually told me that the culprit of my pain was an enlarged ovary. She said it looked like it might also have some fluid around it which would have been consistant with a ruptured cyst which would explain the escalated pain. My appendix, kidneys and gallbladder all looked normal. She also said that the enlargement of the ovary, the pain etc., did not have any affect on the baby (thank you Lord) and then she flipped the screen and there it was my baby with big eye sockets, right there in front of me! 

Baby Stew was moving around like crazy showing off all kinds of new moves! I could see that the spine had developed as well as full eye sockets, arms and legs. She also showed me that Baby Stew had 5 fingers on each hand! I could not believe how clear the scan was and that I could actually see the tiniest, cutest and littlest thumbs ever! 

After letting me gawk and giggle for a bit she finally wheeled me out of the room where I was reunited with Colt, who at this point looked way worse than me. Poor guy had been sitting outside the ultra sound room just waiting to hear if we were ok — we were. I slowly watched as the blood come back into his face. 

Once the scans were read the doctor felt comfortable that the enlarged ovary was indeed the cause of the pain and he requested that I follow up with my doctor on Monday. We left the hospital exhausted but happy. Our baby was going to be ok! 

I followed up with my doctors office the following day but since I wasn’t in any more pain and I already had a scheduled appointment on Wednesday they said we could just go over everything then. 

Wednesday came and went and the appointment went well. It was another routine check up with no ultra sound (boooooo). She did order a blood test for my quad screening though to check for Down syndrome along with all other chromosomal abnormalities and neural tube defects like spina bifida. We also went over my ultra sound results from Sunday. She said she agreed with the fact that my ovary was enlarged but she thought the pain was most likely being caused by round ligament pain which is common in the second trimester especially in active pregnant woman rather than a cyst. She said either way she was just happy that the pain was gone, the baby was ok and that I had went in to the ER because it’s always better to be safe.

My next appointment is tomorrow the 14th with the specialist. I’m looking forward to finally getting some information and answers on the septum and condition. I just want to know every second of every day that our baby is ok. I never thought it would be possible to be so in love with someone that you’ve never even met! Or that it was possible to feel so happy and excited and scared and terrified all at the same time every single day for that person. We love you so much Baby Stew and we are so blessed to be your mommy and daddy! 

Until next time…  

July 4th beach bumming with the fam

  

Baby Stew Monthly Recap

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Month:

June 

Baby Size: 

Weeks 11 – 14 

Brussel Sprout, Passion Fruit , Lemon, Beet 

I’m Feeling:

Overly excited and ridiculously happy 

 Food I love:

  • Watermelon 
  • Salad 
  • Cucumbers with apple cider vinegar and salt 
  • Red Meat 
  • Wendy’s junior bacon cheese burger with honey mustard 

Food I hate: 

Still no food aversions but I also haven’t been into sweets like cookies, brownies or ice cream 

Strong smells also still get me pretty gaggy! 

3 Pro’s of June:

  1. My energy is back to normal and most days I feel really really good! I love that I’m able to workout and that I found a good prenatal yoga class 
  2. I got to celebrate my first birthday pregnant – hello 31
  3. My friend Deni had her baby! Welcome to the world baby Amelia! 

3 Con’s of June:

  1. No ultra sounds so we didn’t get to see, peek in on or check up on Baby Stew 
  2. My allergies are out of control with minimal to no relief 
  3. Migraine number 2 

Currently living in:

Bikinis, Sports bras, Yoga pants, Sundresses  

Looking forward to:

My doctors appointment on the 8th of July 

Dreaming about:

Nursery designs and Baby Shopping 

Milestone:

The “bump-a-lution” 

Baby Stew is Growing! 

 

Week 11

  

Week 12

  

Week 13

  

Week 14

 

Last day of June

 
  

 

Live Feed

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The last week and a half has been a whirlwind of changes and emotions. 

Having everyone officially find out we are expecting has been so unbelievably overwhelming but in the best way possible. We have received so much love and encouragement and support. It truly stops you dead in your tracks and reminds you how blessed you truly are with the most amazing families and friends.  

Sharing the news was also a wonderful way to bring in my 31st birthday. Colt made the week extra special for me by bringing home a card and present everyday. We don’t usually do presents so it was really fun to get spoiled all week long. He did really good and bought me everything from MAC to gelato to new workout clothes to the biggest and baddest pregnancy pillow ever just to name a few. 

This pillow is seriously the mother load of all pregnancy pillows! We found it on Amazon and instantly I knew it had to be mine. It was so big and looked so perfect until I saw the price tag – $100 for a pillow! The perfect part went right out the window. Colt knows I would never spend that kind of money on something like that so I opted for the next best, more wallet friendly version and called it a day! Lucky for me it was my birthday and Colt spoils me to death so you can imagine my surprise and excitement when it came in the mail a few days later! I couldn’t believe it was mine, I’m so in love and I’m already sleeping so much better! As for Colt and Kai, well let’s just say it’s not the smallest thing on the bed so they don’t exactly love it! 

 
Kailea is pretty much deathly afraid of it and Colt can’t even get within a foot of me so it’s pretty interesting so far – haha! It’s a good thing it’s so legit and that it makes me so happy! 

For my actual birthday I had to work! I think it was the first time in years and years that I actually worked on my birthday but it wasn’t bad which is when you know you are truly doing what you love to do. I coached two morning classes then meet Anu and we did nails! We later met up with Joe & Anu and had a spectacular dinner at Duo at the four seasons. It was so nice and we all ate entirely to much but it was the perfect way to ring in 31 and this next chapter. 

   
 

Week 13 continues to bring renewed energy which I absolutely love. I still take full advantage of napping as often and as much as possible which I think is helping Baby Stew grow since my belly continues to pop a little more everyday. I’m in the stage where things are starting to get snug but since I don’t really look pregnant it’s difficult. I had a really hard time finding a birthday outfit and the workout outfit that my father in law bought me for my birthday made me look like a big fat marshmallow. 

It’s been some what challenging to not get a little down and stressed about the sudden and BIG changes going on within my body but I just keep reminding myself that it’s totally normal and that gaining healthy weight is essential to Baby Stew’s development. I’m trying to take everything in stride and one day at a time while constantly reminding myself to be gentle. Moderation is my new favorite word to live by and with my renewed energy I’m back in the gym and running which helps a ton! I also just did my first prenatal yoga class and I absolutely fell in love! I am really excited to add that to my weekly mix of activities during the next few months.  
   

  

My first official “bump” picture on my way to my prenatal yoga class at 13 weeks and 5 days! 

I can’t believe that June and my first trimester are already coming to an end! I’m a little sad it’s going by so fast but I’m also so excited for what’s still to come. My doctor called me today and asked me to switch my next appointment from Monday the 6th to Wednesday the 8th. I’m hoping by then we will get to find out if Baby Stew is a boy or a girl! And if not at that appointment then hopefully we will find out on the 14th when I see the specialist! What’s your guess? I can honestly say that I really have no idea! 

Until next time…..

12 weeks = 3 months 

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So we’re totally turning into “those” people, the ones who use weeks instead of months when someone asks how far along we are! We promised we would NEVER be those people and here we are! 

To our defense and as an apology to “those people” I totally get it now! When your pregnant everything goes by weeks! All your app updates, pregnancy trackers, things you look up online and doctors all talk in regards to weeks so it’s just easy to follow suite. So here we are referencing everything in weeks, but I promise once the baby is born if you ask me how old he or she is and I tell you they are 208 weeks, or even 24 months please just slap me, no seriously though. 

Hitting the 12 week, 3 month mark has brought a whole new world of excitement and anxiousness. We officially sent out all announcements to our extened families and close friends on Friday. I am SO excited for people to start getting them but it’s also making me a little anxious to have the news go completely public since it still feels so early in the pregnancy to me.

I have my next two appointments in July and it seems like forever away so for now I’m just trying to enjoy the day to day and embrace everyday of pregnancy as it comes. 

My nausea and exhaustion has officially subsided (thank you placenta) but now it’s heartburn taking its place. I also got my first migraine on Friday around 4pm and it lasted through Saturday evening. It was so painful and so sad because there was nothing I could do but ride it out. I read that hormones at this stage are the leading cause of mirgranes especially if you are previously prone to them which I am. I think this migraine might have been brought on from not drinking enough water and not eating enough. 

Everyday is a new trial and era and I’m learning how to take care of the new me with Baby Stew in tote. I’m also so thankful that Colt is so amazing to me and that he is really understanding of everything I am going through on the day to day. It’s nice to be able to lay in bed all day if I need to and he just happily understands and helps out with anything I need. I’m so lucky and I know this. 

 

He’s also extremely creative and crafty and is totally rocking our weekly Baby Stew board! And yes, he does these all free hand with just chalk pens! 

Today has been such a beautiful day filled with lots of sunshine and good energy and I know it’s going to be an even better week! 

Until next time…

  
Suns out, Bumps out! 

 12 weeks and 2 days or 3 months! Lol 

11 weeks, 6 days 

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I didn’t take a nap today. It’s the first time since finding out I was pregnant that I didn’t take a nap. This may seem like no big deal to most people but to me this was a huge milestone since its proof I am giving way to my second trimester!

Second trimester! It doesn’t even seem possible that I’ve been pregnant for 3 months, (well almost) I’m 11 weeks and 6 days and as my first trimester slowly comes to an end believe me I can tell.

This week my energy seems to be back to normal and I feel more and more like my old self, well minus the protruding belly. I know it’s not even close to looking like or being a baby bump yet and I doubt other people could even notice it but to me it’s huge especially since I’m up 5 pounds which feels like 100 on my frame (and for the record I’m pretty sure 2 pounds of it are in my boobs). 

Other than the every day noticeable changes in my physical-ness it’s also been a really big and exciting week because we’ve been gearing up to make our official pregnancy announcement to our extended family and friends. I also told my boss which was such a huge amount of relief but it also made things seem so much more real!

For the announcement we’ve had all these great ideas (Pinterest inspired and for the record Pinterest you are the devil) but really we’ve seen it all! There are so many fun and creative ways to tell your loved ones your exciting news now a days and lucky for us my best friend Anu also happens to be a great photographer which means photo shoots all day, everyday!

Once we decided on our announcement idea we set up the day and time with Anu and got the props ready! I fell in love with the big golden balloons that spell out BABY. I ordered them on Amazon and eagerly waited for them to arrive. On Saturday an hour before the photo shoot Colt and I drove to the mall to get them blown up (note to the world blowing up 40″ balloons in Maui is not cheap and or worth it) $50 later the balloons were blown up and we were on our way home to get ready.

Once we got home we decided to not mess with the balloons so we left them in the car and went in to grab the rest of our stuff. We knew we would be quick and we were in and out just in time to get back to the car and see that one of our “B” balloons had popped, big slice right down the middle — melt down city 

Not only was it popped it was unfix-able and and not only was it unfix-able it was a disaster (a now very expansive disaster) I was pissed but since it was already late I couldn’t really cancel so we re-grouped and went up to take the pictures anyways.

To say Anu & Colt are miracle workers would be a major understatement because they some how pulled me out of the worst, saddest, most pissed off mood ever and Anu ended up getting some of the best, most beautiful, timeless and perfect pictures. She is truly so talented! 

By the end of the shoot we were all in agreement that the balloons just weren’t meant to be. We were also really glad that the pictures were done so we could now make and send our announcements.


  

The above three are the ones we decided on to actually send out as the announcement. There were so many great ones but in the end we felt these three were the best line up and flow! Below are a few of the other awesome “runner ups”


          

    

It’s been a wonderful first trimester of privacy, joy and a lot of unknowns but we are ready, excited & hopeful and we can’t wait to finally tell the world about our newest, greatest adventure.

In life there are perfect moments. You cannot plan them – the very act interferes with the laws of the universe – but you must be ready to recognize them when they come…”

Until next time…


Baby Stew Monthly Recap 

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Month:

May

Baby’s Size:

Weeks 6-10

Pomegranate Seed, Blueberry, Raspberry, Green Olive, Kumquat

I’m Feeling:

Excited & happy but nervous since it is still so early on. My energy is also non-existent and I am tired all the time. I’m napping everyday and I’m nauseous pretty consistently all day long

 Food I love:

  • Cracker Barrel Sharp White Cheddar Cheese
  • Grapes
  • Crackers
  • Smart Food 

Food I hate:

No food aversion but the smell of pee makes me want to puke  

 3 Pro’s of May:

1. Got to see the baby twice and got to hear the heart beat for the very first time
2. Getting to sharing the news with our immediate families
3. Taking first round announcement pictures with Anu

3 Con’s of May:

1. Having to go for a second ultra sound to get a better look at a spot that showed up during my 8 week ultra sound on my uterus. Having to wait until June 5th to get the results
2. Fatigue and Nausea had me feeling pretty crappy most of the days
3. Not being able to scream from the rooftops that we are pregnant!

Currently living in:

Gym Clothes, PJ’s and Bikini’s

Looking forward to:

My Doctors appointment on June 5th

Being able to tell extended family and friends

Dreaming about:

A happy, healthy Baby Stew and if it’s a boy or a girl?!? 

Milestone:

  
This is the first picture I saw of myself and said “Wow, I look pregnant!” It was taking at 10 weeks and 2 days during my Moms birthday camping trip in Hana! 

I still can’t believe we are going to be parents! 

 

The Spot

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On Tuesday May 26th I went in for my second ultra sound. I was now 9 weeks and 4 days and anxious to get this appointment over with. All we knew was that my doctor had found a small spot on my uterus during my 8 week ultra sound and that she wanted to get a better look at it. She wasn’t sure what it was so she told us not to get too worried or upset especially since all my tests were normal and the baby looked good with a strong heartbeat.

I went in with an open mind knowing that anything was possible but hoping for the best. The ultra sound tech was an older lady who was very nice. She explained that she would be performing an external and internal ultra sound to get the best reading and pictures possible and that it would take about an hour. I prepared myself mentally as she lubed up my belly. I knew I probably wasn’t going to be able to hear the baby’s heart beat again but I was hoping I could at least sneak a peak to see how it was going. 

As she got started it seemed like forever before she spoke. I swear my heart didn’t beat for a solid mintute as I waited for her to say something… anything! As I laid there still and worried she finally said there it is, that white light flickering is your babies heartbeat. (Whew, exhale, heartbeat, sigh of relief..)

She continued on with the ultrasound only making small talk about how far along I was and confirming that my due date was spot on for Christmas Day on December 25th, asking what I did for a living, if the pregnancy had been planned. It was a good 15-20 minutes in before she turned the screen to me and said “there is your baby” as I looked up I couldn’t believe my eyes. Baby Stew had literally doubled in size from a week and a half ago! As we zoomed in to take a better look the tech started laughing and said “it looks like you’re going to have a gymnast like yourself, look at the legs they haven’t stopped moving!” I couldn’t believe it Baby Stew’s legs were kicking like crazy! The baby was actually moving! It was like dance dance fever in there and my heart melted into a thousand pieces. 

I came home from the ultra sound feeling extremely happy and excited at how big and cute Baby Stew had gotten but I was also nervous and anxious. I had gotten a weird vibe from the tech and I just knew in my heart that the spot was going to be something more than just “nothing”. 

I called my doctor that Friday since I hadn’t heard anything and the receptionist told me the scans were in and my doctor would call me if anything was abnormal. If there wasn’t anything abnormal then she would just go over them with me at my next appointment that following Friday on June 5th. I waited all week anxiously by the phone and by Friday when I hadn’t heard back I went into my appointment feeling relieved, clearly it was nothing major since she never called. 

I got to my appointment at noon and I met with the nurse. There was so much paperwork and health history to go over and once all of that was finally done I waited on my doctor. She came in and we went over the usual. How was I feeling? Any new symptoms? Anything that was concerning me? Umm yea what the hell was that spot! I asked her about my results of the ultra sound and waited as she delivered the news. 

The spot was a uterine septum — a what? A uterine septum — english please. 

Basically a uterine septum is a common type of congenital uterine anomaly meaning that when the uterus is formed during embryogenesis by the fusion of the two Müllerian ducts something goes wrong in the process and it causes incomplete absorption. The reasons for this happening is not known. So basically in English and to the best of my understanding I have an abnormal shaped uterus and depending on how big or small the actual uterine septum is it could cause different problems / complications with my pregnancy. 

I’m pretty sure my heart stopped beating again while my doctor delivered all this news. Part of me couldn’t understand what the hell she was saying while the other part was so scared I didn’t want to understand it anyways. As I caught my breathe I finally asked so what’s next

I have to see a specialist from Oahu next month to see if the septum is minor or more serious. So far my doctor thinks it’s very minor but she wants to take a better look at it. If it goes more than half way down then that’s considered extreme and I’ll be considered a higher risk pregnancy which means I could be at risk of delivering the baby early or for the baby not having enough room to grow and being breech in which case I would need to have a c-section to deliver. In extreme cases the baby can actually implant on the septum and if that happens it would most likely cause you to have an early miscarriage because the baby can’t get enough blood and nutrients to survive. My doctor does not think this is the case with me since all my tests have been normal and my ultra sound shows the baby is growing. 

She did say however that this was most likely the reason we did have a harder time getting pregnant and it was also most likely the cause for my irregular periods. She also said that she still felt safe that we could announce our pregnancy at 12 weeks if we chose to since as of now the baby was fine. 

After all that “ugly news” she had me lay down and she did an on the belly heartbeat ultra sound. It was instant, Baby Stew’s heart was beating strong.

My next appointment is on July 6th and then I’ll see the specialist on July 14th. I’m nervous and scared and anxious but mostly hopeful. At this point I need to believe that everything is going to be alright and that Baby Stew (and my pregnancy) are going to be happy and healthy! 

For now we only ask that you please add us to your prayers or send positive vibes, light or love our way as we continue to hope for the best. I just know in my heart that this is meant to be. 

 
My best friend Kristen sent me this amazing & thoughtful framed scripture for Baby Stew’s nursery. The moment I opened it something in my heart went still as it was just so powerful & reassuring to me. We are so grateful to have such an amazing and strong support system as we journey into this next chapter. 

 

Until next time…

A Whole New World 

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Finding out your pregnant, having your doctor confirm it and then hearing your babies first heartbeat has got to be one of the most exciting and scariest times in any woman’s life regardless if you “planned” it or not! With emotions (and hormones) running high all you can think is “this is it, ready or not here we go.”

Now before I go on, here is the part in my blog where I am going to give you an “out” on top of a disclaimer. This is your chance to read along on my journey or decide to sign off. With that being said if you don’t want to hear the good, the bad, the gross, the scary and everything else in between please discontinue reading.

Over the next 9 months I intend to document my pregnancy journey in all its raw and natural glory. I want to be able to come back here months or years from now and see how far we’ve come and how much changed from week to week and month to month. I also want our child to someday be able to come here and have an unedited look at his or her early life as it unfolded during these very special first 9 months.

Alright so if you’re still here welcome! I’m excited to have you along and I truly appreciate your love and support along this incredible, life changing journey!

My first nine weeks of pregnancy have been pretty “mild” in regards to the pregnancy scale. I ride the nausea train pretty much from morning to night with little relief however I have yet to throw up (not even once) which I hear is pretty incredible since I know a lot of woman are stuck in the bathroom for the first 3 months. For this I am grateful and it makes the nausea more manageable. I like to believe that baby Stew knows that my job and life require me to be active and that he or she is having some mercy on me while I adjust to my new state of self.

Some other noticeable changes so far have been exhaustion and I don’t mean the every day I’m so tired, so sleepy kind. I mean full on body-aching, can’t keep my eyes open, get me to the closest thing that looks like a bed right now. The only thing I can relate it to is when you are a kid in the summer and you come in after a long day at the beach and playing outside and you fall asleep in your dinner because your just done. Lights out.

Only most days I don’t even make it to dinner I’m typically napping by noon on my lunch break for at least 30 minutes if not 45 if I can sneak it in. The naps help and I do usually get a second wind but only until about 7:30 and then I’m passing out again trying like hell to stay awake until at least 8 (not going to happen).

On top of the nausea and exhaustion my boobs have officially turned into monster A and monster B. I always wanted to know how I would look with a boob job so if you’ve ever been curious just take a look at me now!

Whew, weeeee the growth on top of the soreness is enough for an entire blog post but I’ll spare you all those details for now and just say ouchy, they really hurt!

I can honestly say those are my three biggest symptoms so far. I also get extremely fatigue when I need to eat which causes me to have super, super low energy which is really hard for me since I’m usually going at about 200 mph. My stomach has also been an up and down roller-coaster but in all fairness that’s pretty much normal for me and I can’t blame it entirely on the pregnancy although I’m sure it does escalate it to some extent. I also pee at least 20 times a day and at least two to three times a night.

Other then those “normal” pregnancy symptoms and the fact that I just feel pregnant all the time the only thing that has been “abnormal” is a black spot that showed up on my uterus during my first ultra sound at 8 weeks. My doctor couldn’t get a good read on it so she’s sending me to an ultra sound doctor to get a better look at it. It’s a little nerve-wracking but at this point in my pregnancy what isn’t? We are just hoping and praying for the best.

Until next time… 


I forgot to post this picture on my last post so I’m posting it now. My first Mothers Day on Sunday May 10, 2015. Colt made my day so relaxing & special! 

We can’t wait to find out who you are Baby Stew. We love you SO much already. 

(p.s. – my boobs have doubled in size since this picture which was taken at 7 weeks and 2 days – ha!)