Driving. Park the car. Wait in car for 10 minutes. Take a deep breath. Say a prayer. Go inside. Get greeted. Fill out paperwork. Wait. Urine test. Wait. Go inside room. Wait. Nurse comes in, “Congratulations Jennifer, you are pregnant.” Watery eyes, blank smile, butterflies, dizziness, is this real life?

This was the order of events that took place on the first Friday of May. I must have asked her “so I’m pregnant” at least 5 times. I still couldn’t (can’t) wrap my head around the fact that the answer continues to be “yes.” I knew it was going to be “yes” the 3 tests at home over the last 2 days all continued to say yes, yes and yes.

With that being said lets back up a minute. I had one of those movie moments on Wednesday morning when the girl wakes up and kinda scratches her head like “damn I never did get my period did I”? My first thought of course was not “maybe I’m pregnant” but rather “here we go again.” I’ve had irregular cycles for the last 13 months since going off birth control with only the last two being “regular” with 29 and 34 days between.

All previous months it’s been 40 to 50+ days which in the “trying” to get pregnant world basically means “it just ain’t going to happen.” No ovulation = no baby. It’s been discouraging to say the very least, your body not doing what it’s suppose to do, what it was essentially made to do, what you are begging for it to do.

We saw the doctor, we did the testing, we did ALL the testing and all the tests pointed to “normal.” There was nothing wrong with either of us besides my daunting and dreadful super long irregular cycles.

“Be patient. Stop stressing. Stop trying. It will happen. Your still so young. Your next. Are you pregnant? Are you pregnant? So are you pregnant…..”

SHUT UP!

I get it!! I really do but when your in the thick of it and you’re feeling like your body is failing you the VERY last thing you need or want to hear are any of the above statements. I get it, you don’t know what else to say. How about, I know this must be really frustrating for you two. Hence my 5 time question to my doctor on Friday afternoon in complete disbelief “so I’m (ME) pregnant?” 

Pregnant – well I’ll be dammed.

A silver lining, happiness, excitement, fear, anxiety…HOPE. That greatest of all HOPE.

A baby. Wow, we are having a baby.

 My two positive at home pregnancy tests on April 29, 2015, I ended up taking a third the next morning and also got a “YES” 

After the doctor confirmed I was indeed pregnant  

First “belly selfies” at 6 weeks, first trimester